Chapter 1 - The Birth of a President

Michael Jeremiah Hendrix was born to Minerva Delila Hendrix, née Washington, from Alhabama, and John Eric Hendrix XXIII, son of Priscilla Madonna Hendrix, née Lincoln, and John Eric Hendrix XXII. The couple had met some years earlier at a ho-down in Mississippi. John was sherrif of Candy Mountain in the state of Texas while Minerva spent her days sowing American flags in a local factory. Minerva later claimed that John's badge had gleamed brightly in the shack that day in 1978 when he asked her to dance and that from that very moment she knew she would become his wife.

John and Minerva stayed in touch by writing things called letters, which is what the world used before email and mobile telephones, and occassionally met up at weekends, when John would drive his Candy Mountain Police Department Chevy to Minerva's parents, where they would hold hands and walk in the garden. The relationship blossomed and, given that extreme right wing Christianity hadn't been invented in 1978, they kissed after only a few months of dating.

The following year John proposed to his sweetheart. Minerva explains what it was like:

"Oh, I remember it well, you know. It was evening July fourth 1979 and we'd gotten some potted meat and some brown bread, because we didn't have white bread in Texas back then, in fact we just called brown bread bread. We'd taken the auto out into the desert and had eaten the picnic and sat on a hill looking over the cactus and the grand canyon and Mount Rushmore and other very American things, and there were some Red Indians in a caravan in the distance beside the nuclear arms base and some prospecters in the river sifting for gold and as the fireworks went off John got down on one knee and offered me a diamond ring. Well, I hadn't never seen a diamond before and its rainbow colors shone so brightly that I just had to accept his offer. It was all very romantic."

John's memories of the event are not so clear:

"Yeah, well, her pa caught us kissing behind the apple tree one day and told me I had to marry her or there'd be trouble. So, me being outside my jurisdiction and all, thought I'd better do as he said. It just happened, like marriages did in those days, is all."

The marriage took place in Candy Mountain Lutheran Church and from that day Minerva left her job sowing American flags and stayed at home baking cookies and doing other very American activities.

Michael was the third son born to John and Minerva. His eldest brother, John Eric Hendrix XIV, was born on July 4 1982 and grew up to become a broker in New York, like the good American he was. The second son, Hank, was born on July 4 1984 and became a navy seal before training as an attorney and starting his own law firm in New York, like the good American he was.

Michael was the black sheep of the family. Minerva went into labour on July 4 1985, but Michael refused to be born until ten days later, on July 14. The family were disappointed and the shame of his non-American birth meant he was not allowed the honor of being given an American name like Hank and so was named Michael Jeremiah. The date of his birth meant that in his first days of life Michael underwent tests for non-American traits such as Communism and social justice, but showing no tendancy towards such horrors and choosing Monopoly from a choice of boardgames he was allowed to live.

A President had been born.